In Maryland, according to the AP, state lawmakers approved an apology for the state's role in the slave trade expressing "profound regret" that it once "trafficked (sic) in human flesh". They must have been in a Colonial mood because they used the old word "trafficked". They made the mistake of literally writing it out like that too... and their S's wound up looking like "F's ......and today they apologized for actually apologizing yesterday for the "Flave" trade.
Following Maryland's lead, Egypt apologized for enslaving the Jews in 4200 BC and added, in a conciliatory tone, "but they built one hell of a pyramid". They then sued various matzoh manufacturers saying, "We deserve a share of the profits for the last 4,000 years. Had we given them time to leave, the bread would have risen. We gave them one day, the bread didn't rise and basically that means we share in the invention of matzoh."
The law firm of Achmed, Ali and Levine is handling the case.
Another apology came from Eric, last descendant of Proctodotus,King of the Visigoths ( 423-419 BC), for enslaving the ancient Croats and using them for paving. Eric, an investment banker working in Des Moines, said, "What exactly is a Croat?"In Japan, Prime Minister Shinzo Abe offered his clearest apology yet, again according to AP, to women who suffered in Japan's WW2 military brothels. As many as 200,000 women of Korean and Chinese extraction were forced to work in these brothels to satisfy the needs of Japanese soldiers during the war.
The official government excuse has been ," This is the land of the Rising Sun' and during the war we needed to help our own 'Rising Sons', so to speak." In conclusion of this latest apology for slavery, Mr. Abe said,"Shit happens. Wal is herr".
His statement is coming a bit late as the war was over 62 years ago. The Junior League, champion of etiquette, said it is far too late to accept an apology and that Japan should have hand written notes to each sex slave in 1946, at the latest 1947.
