Thursday, May 3, 2007

Bad Bosses and Bad Glue, Boston Style


Every boss I've ever had has been an asshole and that includes when I was self -employed! Visit http://blogs.bnet.com/salesmachine/?p=47 and write about YOUR WORST BOSS EVER at my old friend Geoff James' terrific business blog .

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The headline in yesterday's Boston Globe read "Big Dig job may have used wrong epoxy". And when the roof fell down last year, it killed a woman, crushing her car and when that roof fell down, they closed the tunnels screwing up commuting for months as they repaired and checked all the ceilings.

The wrong epoxy? How does such a thing happen? Masspube Construction Research spoke to Rufus Klapzing, Manager of Ceiling Construction on the Big Dig, Boston's system of underground expressway tunnels." The engineers specified a certain glue. They sent us another kind, a generic. It looked the same. We used it."

Records seem to indicate that Modern Continental Construction Inc. used a quick drying epoxy, E'mirs, as opposed to what was specified, Elmers!

"E'mirs, developed by a company in the friendly country of Yemen, looks and tastes the same as Elmer's" said a still close-mouthed Klapzing, close mouthed due to his taste test in 2005. "and we saved 8 cents a gallon on it."


In a little known fact, continued Rip Offe, attorney for Modern Continental Construction Inc., "Several workers who used the good glue are still stuck to the beams inside the ceiling of The Big Dig. The unions and workman's comp got on us. We had to use a different glue! Only one has been released to date (left). We feed them everyday and set up conjugal visits as well. Have you any idea how much that costs? Doesn't anyone care about the working man anymore...like we do!"

The city of Boston suggests visitors bring their own glue when they visit the city until this is all sorted out!







The Pentagon asked that folksinger Joan Baez not entertain the troops...which she was asked to do by John Mellenkamp at a concert he's scheduled to do.

The reason, reports MassPube War Intelligence, is not that she's anti-war, but that the word "Kumbiyah" is the new code word for "Blackhawk Down".

"It's a song too?", asked a bewildered General Peter Pace, "I had no idea.".

He then started humming "I sold my heart to the junkman" and remarked, "Stupid song, but it's stuck in my head. Why would anyone marry a trash man?"

Instead Larry the Cable Guy will sing "Where have all the flowers gone" for our wounded vets!

For his part, Mellenkamp was shocked .... and then responded, "I guess this means that Iranian President Ahmadinejihad won't be called to sing the haftorah at the upcoming Ginsburg Bar Mitzvah in Beverly Hills where I am also scheduled to entertain. I hate to rescind the invitation".