Massachusetts Escapees Have Much in Common

Former Massachusetts governor Mitt "Aren't I good looking. No, really , aren't I" Romney announced for president yesterday ..... in Michigan. Huh?

Well, he grew up there because his dad, George, was both Governor of the state and President of American Motors , the company which gave us the long dead Nash Rambler , the Rambler.....and the Gremlin.

The headline of today's Globe said "Invoking American dream, Romney begins run". Now there's an unusual and controversial platform.

A sidebar story said, "On big day, Mass. gets little note" . In fact I think the only mention was when he said, "Yeah, if I have to, I'll kiss the Catholic's ass and go to mass".

He actually said, "American families are made stronger when children have a mother and a father, healthcare is within everyone's reach, schools are good and taxes are low. This was the agenda I pursued in Massachusetts and it's the agenda I plan to pursue if I'm elected your president".

He forgot to say that none of that happened here in, ahem,"Tax-achusetts", while he was governor. He stunk as governor. By the way, he's lived in blue state Massachusetts most of the last 40 years, but why admit it?

But he is good looking.....no ,really, he is.


Another famed resident of Massachusetts was in the news yesterday. "Little Joe", the Franklin Park Zoo's resident gorilla was put back on display yesterday in a new cage ... after he escaped from the last one (obviously built by the same folks who built The Big Dig) in 2003, injuring a little girl, an 18 year old young lady and rampaging through a neighborhood before he was tranquilized and captured.

I now must quote today's Globe:" Joe ...strode into the cage, eyed the people..and then ran 30 feet to slam his 400 pound frame against the glass....Zoo officials said Joe's antics were normal and a clear sign that the animal is glad to be back onstage"......could I make this up?...."He's so happy", said one the gorilla's keepers,"It's a sign of happiness".

Mitt and Little Joe.....They were both so happy here that they'll both do anything to get the hell out of here..and,FYI, be careful because they're both great at slinging shit! .