Why enjoy the holiday today? This is all I can think about!
I wish I knew what a "Elite Maximatic Power Dynamic Juice Extractor" was, but I can't wait to save $17.99. It sounds like something out of
1. the film "A Christmas Story"
2.The Bat-cave...or
3. perhaps something a Palestinian could mis-read and use on the West Bank , "a 'Jews' Extractor".
In other holiday "News of the Jews", 'The Coalition on the Environment and Jewish Life' has requested synagogues across the country use energy saving flourescent bulbs in their big menorahs. In keeping with the holiday, they can last 8 times as long as regular bulbs.
The coalition's next job will be to ask Moses not to turn his staff into a snake again as the introduction of strange wildife can be destructive to the environment.
.
Could holiday time be worse....sure can !
You think your job blows, Nouri Daoud of Baghdad sells Christmas trees on a corner in Baghdad. Talk about an open job market. For the few Christians still in Baghdad, he's their man. And, from what I can tell, he's lucky he still has the head for it. Business is down slightly since Moslem lunatics will kill anybody they see buying a Christmas tree. He's down to selling 3-10 a day.
Other Christmas jobs might include a place on the Catholic League's Nativity Scene Vandalism Squad.....the job is to take reports of and track Nativity Scene vandalism nationwide. For example in Chicago, 32 plastic Baby Jesus dolls were stolen and lined up against some lady's fence. What else would you do with them.... they are hard to fence.
Merry Christmas and to all, a great bargain tomorrow!
4 comments:
I am "home" in New York City, after coming back from "home" in Pennsylvania for the Chistmas holiday. Read the blog, which made me laugh after the trip. Just wanted to point out some of the things that are different and some the same between rural PA and the Upper West Side, Manhattan on Christmas day:
Different: Grocery stores are open in NYC, closed in PA (winner: NYC)
Same: You can get a parking spot in both NYC and in PA (happiness!)
Different: Birds chirping, carollers carolling in PA, horns honking in NYC
Same: It's a brown, rainy Christmas!
Love to all,
Cousin Kate
Yo. MP. Cousin Kate's reading the blog. So now you got two readers...double the national average.
I have a favor to ask. Would it be possible for you to arrange a meeting with me and the plastic Baby Jesus vandal? As you know, I engage in a similar activity - stealing yellow "Support the Troops" ribbon magnets and sticking them all on cars with Vermont plates.
Don't you think it would be interesting if we got together...me and the plastic Baby Jesus vandal? I know...we could start our own blog!
Double K? Are you my long-lost baby sister, stolen from our Davie HQ many years ago?
Fuck the Jews. You don't vote for us anyway.
Post a Comment